The Buck and Mike Blog

Today is the first day that same-sex couples in Washington, DC, begin picking up marriage licenses. Undoubtedly, some of the first in line will be couples who have been together for 20, 30, or 40 years or more. Some have raised children and have grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Many have worked openly as civil servants for years, getting your social security checks out on time, inspecting your food, manufacturing coins and currency, and testing drugs to make sure they are safe and effective. Some work in the Environmental Protection Agency, helping safeguard our environment. Others work for the Smithsonian Institution, helping safeguard the treasures of our national heritage. Some install cable TV, put out fires, police the streets, manage stores, preach on Sundays, build houses, and fix cars. There will be college students, plumbers, doctors, bus drivers, teachers, artists, cabinet makers, computer programmers, architects, flight attendants, attorneys, and writers. There will be employees of the Red Cross, the World Bank, Amnesty International, the Pentagon, and international embassies.

We know Washington people in all these categories, and some will be waiting in line today. This is a great demonstration of joy, optimism, and love in a city that is often the scene of cynicism. I’m very happy for all of you. If we were not already married, we would be lining up with you.

Read the CNN.com article.

A bill currently before the Minnesota state legislature would ban marriages between people who don’t love each other.

A fascinating article in today’s New York Times shows the importance of words. Apparently, to Americans being gay or lesbian is not as bad as being homosexual. This is no surprize to gay people, who deal with the language of intolerant or uneducated (or both) people every day.

But sometimes the hurt of language cuts even deeper. The leaders of my own church, the Mormons, for example, insists that there are no homosexuals, only people who “suffer from same-sex attraction,” SSA. No, wait, they have changed the words again. Seemingly unable to use the word “sex” they now say we suffer from “same-gender attraction.” Words matter.

But I digress. The New York Times article:

New Poll Shows Support for Repeal of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’

By DALIA SUSSMAN
As the Obama administration proposes repealing the policy known as “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” a new New York Times/CBS News poll finds that a majority of the public support allowing openly gay men and women to serve in the military.

There’s less support, however, for allowing homosexuals to serve openly.

Confused?

The results highlight the importance of wording on the issue. In a test, half of the poll’s respondents were asked their opinion on permitting “gay men and lesbians” to serve, and the other half were asked about permitting “homosexuals” to serve.

The wording of the question proved to make a difference. Seven in 10 respondents said they favor allowing “gay men and lesbians” to serve in the military, including nearly 6 in 10 who said they should be allowed to serve openly. But support was somewhat lower among those who were asked about allowing “homosexuals” to serve, with 59 percent in favor, including 44 percent who support allowing them to serve openly.
» Read the rest of this entry »

New York Times

No Name-Calling Week was inspired by a young adult novel entitled “The Misfits” by popular author, James Howe. The book tells the story of four best friends trying to survive the seventh grade in the face of all too frequent taunts based on their weight, height, intelligence, and sexual orientation/gender expression. Motivated by the inequities they see around them, the “Gang of Five” (as they are known) creates a new political party during student council elections and run on a platform aimed at wiping out name-calling of all kinds. Though they lose the election, they win the support of the school’s principal for their cause and their idea for a “No Name-Calling Day” at school.

Motivated by this simple, yet powerful, idea, the No Name-Calling Week Coalition, created by GLSEN and Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing, and consisting of over 40 national partner organizations, organized an actual No Name-Calling Week in schools across the nation during the week of March 1-5, 2004. This year, No Name-Calling Week will take place the week of January 25-29, 2010. The project seeks to focus national attention on the problem of name-calling in schools, and to provide students and educators with the tools and inspiration to launch an on-going dialogue about ways to eliminate name-calling in their communities.

The Misfits, James Howe, GLSEN, Simon & Schuster, No Name-Calling Week

Portugal’s parliament voted Friday to allow same-sex marriage in the country, making it the sixth country in Europe to grant marriage equality. (Spain, Norway, Belgium, the Netherlands, and Sweden are the others.) Canada, South Africa and several U.S. states also permit same-sex marriages as do a number of large cities (most recently Mexico City).

Read the New York Times article.

On Friday, Washington DC Mayor Adrian Fenty signed the bill passed earlier in the week to permit the issuing of marriage licenses to same-sex couples. The signing ceremony took place at All Souls Unitarian Church, a building familiar to us because it is a block from the apartment where we lived until the summer of 2008 and was part of the view out our living room window.

The mayor reminded those in attendance that his parents, who were present, could not have married 40 years ago in many states because they are a mixed-race couple. The bill was supported by over 300 ministers in the city, many of whom had complained that not allowing them to perform marriages restricted their religious freedom.

Because the District of Columbia is not a state (despite the fact that it’s population is larger than that of Wyoming), Congress has dictatorial power over approving or disapproving everything they do. As an example, when we lived there a Republican Congress has even been able to suppress the results of an election because they knew what the outcome would be and they didn’t like it. In this case, Congress has 30 days to intervene if they find it necessary. Experts do not expect that to happen and we will keep our fingers crossed.

A city always in the forefront of civil rights, Washington voted some time ago to recognize all marriages performed outside its jurisdiction. The area has a high concentration of gay couples, not just in the city but in its Maryland and Virginia suburbs. This is a major win for the movement for marriage equality and we heartily congratulate the city council and the mayor for their courage and commitment to civil and human rights for all.

The video below is of the signing of the bill, produced as part of the church’s Standing on the Side of Love campaign. The sense of joy on the part of clergy, politicians, and attendees is palpable.

Washington DC, Adrian Fenty, District of Columbia, civil rights, marriage equality

Today we celebrate Human Rights Day, the anniversary of the 1948 signing of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. This is possibly the most important individual document ever created by the UN and ratified by member countries. It recognizes the humanity of us all and grants basic rights and protections to all people around the world. The first few words of this powerful document—“All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights”—seem basic, but the concept is still not accepted around much of the world.

There is no better example of the importance of the struggle for basic human rights today than Uganda. A bill before the country’s legislature would make homosexual sex a death-penalty offense. Just being gay could get you a life sentence. If you know someone who is gay and don’t report them within 24 hours, you can get three years in prison. Yes, including family members. As a side effect, we can anticipate an exponential rise in AIDS in a country that until now has had the best prevention program in Africa. “Moral” extremism will kill the country, as it has in so many others.

Read about the Uganda situation in this CNN article.

Amnesty International, the human rights organization I worked with for years, is sponsoring a special Global Write-a-Thon today. Please give a moment of your time to help.

Human Rights Day, Universal Declaration of Human Rights, AIDS, Uganda, Amnesty International

If you live in Maine, you should feel ashamed today.

Maine

I have written about the need to bring struggling lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender Mormons back into the fold, as a demonstration of unconditional love and acceptance. It is a cause I believe in very strongly, as it is a cause of incredible family pain that does not seem to have its equal in non-Mormon families. (See Keep Them and Love Them.)

I have also written about the Foundation for Reconciliation and their laudable activities (see A Move Toward Reconciliation, Bring them In From the Plains and the Home at Last benefit concert). Wednesday, Nov. 4, the anniversary of the passage of Proposition 8 in California with tens of millions of dollars of help from individual Mormons and Mormon companies, all at the request of their ecclesiastical leaders, is another Foundation activity.

The Great LGBT Handcart Rescue begins at 1:00 pm at the This is the Place Monument. From there, the group will trek by handcart, as did so many of our pioneer ancestors, to a 3:30 pm gathering at City Creek Park, at the northeast corner of North Temple and State streets. At 4:00 p.m., the group will deliver a package with signatures from a petition asking for reconciliation with LGBT members to LDS Church Headquarters.

This is an important event in the continuing story of LGBT equality in Utah and in the LDS Church. I encourage all who can spare some time to join in the Wednesday afternoon trek—or at least a part of it—and join the gathering at 3:30. Because so few of us can travel to Utah for the event, we count on those of you who are fair-minded and care about your family members to stand up for them and participate.

And thank you, Foundation for Reconciliation, for your continuing hard work on our behalf.

When President Obama signed the Matthew Shepard/James Bryd Jr Hate Crimes Prevention Act on Wednesday, he promised that from now on Americans will be protected from violence based on “what they look like, who they love, how they pray, or why they are.”

Just to clarify, the bill expands already-existing hate crime legislation from 1969 (yes, 40 years ago!) to include crimes motivated by actual or perceived gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, or disability. It doesn’t mean that Americans who are gay or in wheelchairs have special rights that other Americans don’t have, as irresponsible right-wing talk show hosts would have us believe. Basically, it:

• removes the current prerequisite that the victim be engaging in a federally-protected activity, like voting or going to school, when the crime is committed, as in both the Shepard and Bryd cases;
• gives federal authorities greater ability to engage in hate crimes investigations that local authorities choose not to pursue (so if the local Hooterville, Mississippi, sheriff doesn’t investigate a lynching, the feds can);
• provides funding to help state and local agencies pay for investigating and prosecuting hate crimes (so it isn’t a financial burden on the local police who otherwise might turn their heads);
• requires the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) to track statistics on hate crimes against transgender people (statistics for the other groups are already tracked).

(This list is from a Wikipedia article about the Act. Italicized comments are mine.)

The families of Matthew Shepard and James Bryd Jr. were present for the signing. There is no real comfort for those who have lost a loved one to such hatred and violence, but an act named in their honor is a lasting legacy to their lives and the efforts of their families to get this legislation through Congress. Finally!

How ironic it is that the Act was attached to a defense spending bill, while the military is the one federal agency that does not allow gay, lesbian, and transgender Americans to serve in its ranks.

Does this mean the federal government has done enough for gays and lesbians? Absolutely not! It’s only a start, but it’s something.

I recommend Andres Kessinger’s piece in today’s Washington Post: Help Gays Who Aren’t Hurt.

Obama, Matthew Shepard/James Bryd Jr Hate Crimes Prevention Act

With the debut this past weekend of the Spike Jonze film Where the Wild Things Are, I was reminded of a New York Times article from September of last year. Maurice Sendak, who wrote the original children’s book over 45 years ago, was interviewed on the occasion of his 80th birthday.

In the article, the dedicated curmudgeon speaks candidly about his grief over the death in 2007 of his partner, psychoanalyst Dr. Eugene Glynn, with whom he shared his life for 50 years. I was struck by their mutual devotion and I thought about how few heterosexual couples stay together for 50 years. Yet so many people spend their time, energy, and money in a paranoid effort to keep the Maurice Sendaks of the world from the responsibilities and benefits that come with marriage. The fear that the world with end if gay people are allowed to marry is irrational in every way.

In Where the Wild Things Are Max learns about irrational fears. The boy faces down his fears about the wild things and those very fears make him king. He emerges with bravery and a better sense of who he is. Nearly a half-century later, it remains a lesson for us all. Perhaps we should set aside our irrational fears and begin to spend time and energy learning who we really are. On that day “Let the wild rumpus start!”

Read the September 2008 New York Times article here.

Spike Jonze, Maurice Sendak, Eugene Glynn, Where the Wild Things Are

The National Equality March , which takes place Sunday afternoon, is the largest march for gay and lesbian rights in decades. More importantly, it is the culmination of days of equal rights-based activities in our nation’s capital.

Many people, including some activists in the gay community, questioned the effectiveness of marching at this particular time. Congress is on break for the Columbus Day federal holiday, which severely limits the lobbying possibilities. But in truth, lobbying was never part of the plans. Politicians don’t have to be in town to see the strength and passion of the movement. The long weekend event is packed with meetings, workshops, and trainings for local activists. The march is the culmination of the activities. » Read the rest of this entry »