The Buck and Mike Blog

I thought this was a balanced opinion piece, so I’m reprinting it here. The words and opinions are the author’s.

Pro-Liberty, Not Anti-Mormon

Joel Engardio

The lights of local TV cameras seeking gay-on-the-street sound-bites illuminated the darker part of Broadway on the Upper West Side where thousands of people marched the other night chanting, “Gay, straight, black, white, marriage is a civil right.”

I was one of them, upset and disillusioned that a right could be so easily eliminated for an entire group of people that included me. Sure, New York has never allowed same-sex marriage. But it was a right granted in California until a simple majority of voters decided that gay relationships weren’t equal to their own.

I joined up with the march in progress at West 66th Street, in front of Manhattan’s Mormon Temple. The spot was significant because California’s constitutional amendment was bankrolled largely by the Mormon Church, which urged its members nationwide to donate tens of millions of dollars to stop gay couples and their families from receiving the same legal recognition and protections everyone else enjoys.

“Two-four-six-eight, separate church and state,” the crowd shouted.

I couldn’t agree more. Working for the American Civil Liberties UnionI know this concept is what allows America to be America—we may not be each other’s cup of tea in our beliefs and actions, but somehow we have to find a way for a variety of kettles to peacefully share the stove. » Read the rest of this entry »

Joel Engardio, Mormon Church, American Civil Liberties Union

Veterans Day is to commemorate those who have served our country since its beginning. Mike and I are very proud, especially, of our fathers. Both served in WWII. My dad served as a Marine on an aircraft carrier in the Pacific during and immediately after the war. Mike’s dad still has scars and pieces of metal inside his body from serious wounds he received while serving in the Army in Europe. They both returned alive, but—like all veterans—with memories that never left them the same. They both went on to be great fathers and examples to us and to their respective communities. Mike called his dad, who is still living, to thank him once again for his service. I wish my dad were around so I could call him.

It is also a time to remember that war is not glorious and has its costs. The many thousands who survive their service are changed, some not for the best. Those who suffer, physical, psychological, and spiritual wounds deserve our help.

Our most recent war has so far claimed 4,780 lives. The Bush Administration forbids photographs of the caskets as they return, lest they “upset people.” But we must face the reality of what war really means. Each of the caskets below represents a man or woman who paid the ultimate price in our name. It is in their memory that we must work tirelessly to eliminate the causes of war.

Here is one casket:

The next page shows what 4,780 caskets looks like.

» Read the rest of this entry »

Every election brings both victory and defeat. We have all lost time, money, and emotional energy. If we truly cared about the outcomes, there are bound to be severe wounds and ugly bruises that need healing. At deep emotional losses, we all go through a period of grief, with its requisite stages—denial, anger, depression, and acceptance—in order to be healed.

It is our sincere desire that the healing begin now. Some things transcend our political differences, no matter how passionate our beliefs. Things like family, friends, country, and the world community. We pray we may begin to rebuild, one relationship at a time, with civility and respect. Please join us in that prayer. It’s a new day. Let’s move on.

We must not give up our core beliefs and hopes. We will continue to advocate for the things that we believe in, hope for, and dream for. A life lived without belief, hope, and passion is an empty one. We must have hope that our dreams of a better world will be fulfilled, but we know that it won’t happen without lots of work.

“Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up.”
—Activist and writer Anne Lamott

I’m delighted that Barack Obama won so decisively in Tuesday’s election. He won in every group except white people over 65. These senior citizens stuck with voting for their senior citizen, but not by an overwhelming majority. The election shows that America is finally growing up and willing to change the world by hard work and by example rather than by greed and force.

America still has a long way to go, however. The passage of Proposition 8 in California, to amend the state constitution to remove the right of same-sex couples to marry, shows that special interest groups can still buy their way. I’m saddened that people felt it was more important to spend $75 million dollars on the campaign than to use that money to feed a few hundred thousand people in Africa for a few months. The campaign was losing by 17 points before out-of-state religious groups became involved and the money started flowing in to purchase TV ad time. The ads used fear and lies about the effects on children, education, and religious institutions to sway voters. Pleas from the state Superintendent of Schools, the mayors of all the major cities, the Senators, virtually every newspaper, and hundreds of clergy were not sufficient to counteract the misinformation.

The irony that religious money went to break up stable and commited families and make their children illegitimate is heartbreaking. Just as with the rights of African Americans and the civil rights of women, religious institutions are the last to grow up. Our children and grandchildren will look back on this day and shake their heads with disbelief, just as we do at the “Whites Only” signs on water fountains and restaurants. The majority question then was, “They have their water fountains. What difference does it make if they are separate from ours?” The majority question in California today is, “They have pretty much all the rights of marriage. Why do then need to have real marriage?”

Last night someone said, “It’s just an election. My candidate lost and your proposition lost. It’s the same thing. Life goes on.” The wise answer was, “You didn’t lose any of your civil rights. My wife and I lost our family. Life can’t just go on.”

Our video friends share their thoughts on California’s Proposition 8. Please join them.

We all make mistakes, and campaigning politicians have to speak so often it’s no surprise that they get confused. But still, this one from John McCain wins as the weirdest since Sarah Palin’s interview with Katie Couric. Even poor Cindy McCain looks baffled in the background.

John McCain, Sarah Palin, Cindy McCain

Sarah Palin is an easy target because she is so wrong. Someone on “The View” this morning asked the question: “If she hates Washington so much, why is she so anxious to live there?” Of all the amazingly intelligent, thoughtful, articulate, and experienced Republican women leaders in the country, I still don’t get why John McCain chose her. Your thoughts?

Will you be as glad as me to have this election over?

Sarah Palin, The View, John McCain

Just for fun, some of my favorite humor of the season. Biased? You betcha, Sarah.

October 11, is National Coming Out Day, an annual reminder that gay people help themselves and others when we are completely open about our identity. Founded in 1988 by Dr. Robert Eichberg and Jean O’Leary in celebration of the Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights the previous year, the day is a chance to think about the areas of our lives where we have not been fully honest with others. If our families don’t know, then we are not allowing them to be close to us. If we permit our employers to assume things about us that aren’t true, then we are being dishonest with them. Further, it is an opportunity to present a human face of the LGBT community to the public. We have all seen that is harder to dismiss us as a group if people know us as individuals.

The video below was produced by the Human Rights Campaign.

» Read the rest of this entry »

National Coming Out Day

The Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America (IAVA) Action Fund is the foremost nonprofit, non-partisan advocate for our nation’s returning warriors and their families. The 2008 Veteran Report Card, based on the key veterans’ legislation that came to a vote during the 110th Congress, grades every Senator and Representative on their level of support for our troops.

The ratings reflected votes on 22 key bills before congress. They covered the entire range of issues facing new veterans, including veterans’ health care, the new GI Bill, mental health, and support for homeless veterans.

You would think by his rhetoric that John McCain would be top of the list, but you would be wrong. In fact, he scored among the bottom four of all 100 senators.

Read or download and study the entire report card here.

Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America, Veteran Report Card, John McCain